Claw marks in the frozen peas

What 3 Dates With Me Might Be Like...

• Date #1: Vinh, you've really got your life together!
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• Date #2: So what you're saying is that Target should be considered a religion??
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• Date #3: Can we not go to the Outback Steakhouse next time? You've taken me here three times in a row.
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• Reilly: so emm
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• Reilly: you're kinda a uh... intellectual or some shit
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• Vinh: do intellectuals talk about ugly babies?
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• Reilly: some do
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• Reilly: the strange ones do
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• Vinh: And how are you just now figuring that i'm an intellectual? I've known you since like 98 bitch
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• Reilly: maybe you just recently blossomed as one
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• Reilly: LOL
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• Vinh: :(
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I Love My Chiropractor

• Vinh: I don't know why I didn't do this sooner, but I finally looked at my MRIs that I had done last Fall.
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• Vinh: It's interesting to say the least
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• Doctor: Yeah, you're fucked...heh
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Garfield Minus Garfield Minus Jon Arbuckle Plus Vinh

• Vinh: i rarely get non-spam email
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• Vinh: and when i do i get excited
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• Vinh: but then i realize it's just another email from Obama asking me to donate money
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• -----
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• Vinh: i tried to reblog that post you made of me
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• Vinh: but then it felt narcisstic
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• Vinh: "vinh just reblogged a chat where it looks like he's talking to himself"
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• -----
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• Vinh: fix the narcissistic typo so I look smarter
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• Vinh: :)
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• Vinh: and don't quote that
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• Vinh: you're going to quote that aren't you?
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• Vinh: She hasn't called me back yet
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• Vinh: i'm on the verge of being over it, which sucks
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• Vinh: she's a really cool chick
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• Mike: plenty of fish in the sea
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• Mike: you could do what I do
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• Mike: I just meet a chick and show her my dick
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• Mike: i'm like take it or leave it bitch
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• Vinh: so you want me to meet a chick and show her your dick?
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• Mike: lol
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• Mike: hi i'm vinh please see my friend's dick
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• Vinh: *whips out iphone* "here's a pic of my buddy's dick. take it or leave it"
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• Vinh: and then i pinch-zoom on it
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• Vinh: "watch this dick get bigger. now, imagine it being yours"
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• Mike: chelsea lately
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• Mike: I think she's my new hero
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• Mike: she just said if obama is president, us white people are going to be picking cotton within three years
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• Vinh: i hope so
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• Vinh: fuck you guys
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• Vinh: A pigeon got into the attic, found its way into my wall and now it can't get out
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• Vinh: i've been listening to it struggle for a few days
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• Brian: that sucks man
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• Vinh: my dad said there's nothing he can do to get it out...so i get to listen to it slowly die
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• Vinh: hopefully there aren't such a thing as bird-ghosts
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• Brian: jeeze...
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• Brian: it knows your soul is good
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• Brian: your dad on the other hand.... he will be haunted
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• Vinh: no, i tried banging on the wall to get it to stop making noise
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• Brian: ok you get haunted
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• Vinh: http://icanhascheezburger.files.wordpress.com/2008/03/funny-pictures-bird-window-fail.jpg
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• Jason: hah
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• Jason: i wonder if they have a human fail site
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• Vinh: Yeah, it's called myspace
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Too Much Info

• Tina: so this is probably too much information...but i feel the need to share with at least one person
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• Tina: but i pretty much haven't shaved my legs in like a month. mainly because it's winter, so there's no point. however, i did get around to taking care of that today and i'm so excited for bed tonight
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• Tina: because there's nothing greater than freshly shaved legs and clean sheets
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• Vinh: My soul just died a little
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• Co-worker: So my brother's friend just went crazy this weekend.
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• Me: How? Did he get committed?
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• Co-worker: I guess he went to some party with my brother and someone gave him a beer with 14 hits of acid.
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• Co-worker: What's considered the normal amount of acid?
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• Me: Uh...zero?
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